The Power of “No”: Master Boundaries in 6 Clear Steps

Feeling pulled in all directions? Burnt out? Secretly resenting customers, coworkers, or even family? It's time to master the art of boundaries.

The trades world celebrates problem solvers and those who go the extra mile, but without proper boundaries, that admirable work ethic leads straight to exhaustion and frustration. In this powerful episode, we dive deep into what boundaries really are (hint: not walls keeping people out, but fences protecting what matters most) and why they're especially crucial for plumbers, HVAC techs, drain specialists, and other skilled tradespeople.

You'll discover why setting boundaries feels so difficult, especially when we're conditioned to be providers rather than protectors of our own time. I share the exact phrases you can use to say no without guilt, protect your energy on job sites, and hold the line when people test your limits. From dealing with demanding customers to managing after-hours work calls, these practical examples will transform how you approach your professional and personal life.

Remember this: "A boundary without consequences is not a boundary." Learn how to not just set limits but enforce them consistently, even as they evolve throughout your career. Understand that when you first start setting boundaries, people might resist—and that's actually proof they're working! Your job isn't to keep everyone happy; it's to keep yourself healthy, focused, and respected.

Ready to reclaim your time, energy, and self-respect? Take my challenge: identify one area where you're saying yes but really want to say no, and commit to changing that pattern this week. Your future self will thank you.

Chapters

• 0:00 Welcome & Introduction to Boundaries
• 4:46 What Boundaries Are & Why They Matter
• 8:13 The Art of Saying No Without Guilt
• 11:15 Setting Consequences for Boundary Violations
• 13:32 Real-World Boundary Examples on the Job
• 17:26 Balancing Boundaries with Responsibility
• 20:56 Creating More Energy Through Better Boundaries
• 23:25 Final Challenge & Closing Thoughts

Transcript

Corey Berrier: 1:25

Welcome to the Successful Life Podcast. I'm your host, Corey Berrier. What's up y'all? Today's episode is a big one, and it's packed with real talk, practical tools, and personal experiences on a topic that nobody teaches you, but every single one of us needs to master. We're talking about boundaries today. That's right, Boundaries in the field, boundaries in your family, boundaries at the shop, boundaries with your team, boundaries with your boss, hell, even with your customers. Because, let's be honest, as plumbers and drain technicians and sewer specialists and HVAC techs, we're problem solvers. We show up, we fix things, we say yes, we go the extra mile, and that's great. But if we're not careful, we end up giving too much of ourselves physically, mentally, and emotionally. So today, this is what we're doing. This is what we're talking about today, boundaries, they're why and most of us struggle with boundaries. How to say no without feeling guilty. How do do you hold the line when people test you? on the job and at home. How

Corey Berrier: 3:03

If you've ever felt burnt out or resentful or like you're being pulled in 10 different directions, pay attention. This podcast is for you, so let's get into it. What are boundaries really? Let's start with the basics. A boundary is not a wall. It's not shutting people out. A boundary is not a wall. It's not shutting people out. It's not about being rude or being selfish. A boundary is a fence A fence around what matters most to you. It tells people what you will allow and what you won't, and it sets the stage of how you want to be treated. So it's sort of like.

Corey Berrier: 3:54

I'll give you an example. It's like a clean out. You need a clear access point to control the flow. Without it, everything backs up and eventually explodes. It's the same thing with your life. If you don't have boundaries, pressure builds up and suddenly you're snapping at your kids, you're ghosting your buddies and you're resenting your customers.

Corey Berrier: 4:24

So why is setting boundaries, why does it feel so damn hard? Let's be honest here, especially with the guys in the trucks every day, right, setting boundaries isn't easy. Why? Because we don't want to disappoint people I've gone through the same thing. Because we're taught to be providers, not protectors, of our own time. Because we care about what people think, especially family coworkers, even customers. How many times have you said yes to a weekend call that you didn't want to take, that you didn't want to take, or stay late when you were already exhausted, or agree to something just to keep the peace. Well, it seems easier in the moment, but long term, it chips away at your self-respect, and it chips away in such a small way that you don't even realize it's happening.

Corey Berrier: 5:35

Boundaries protect what you value. Think about this If you say family is important, but you never make it home for dinner because you're constantly overcommitting, make it home for dinner because you're constantly over committing, what does that say about you? Boundaries are not just about saying no. They're about the really how you, how you, honor your own values If you're. If your health matters, set a boundary around, rest If your family matters, protect time with them. If your professionalism matters, you don't allow people to treat you like a doormat. The people around you learn what you value by what you allow. Not what you say, but what you allow, and you know it's so.

Corey Berrier: 6:38

The art of saying no without feeling guilty is the most powerful tool in your word toolbox, so to speak. It's the word no. No, I'm not available tonight. No, I can't take another job. No, that doesn't work for me. That's it. You don't owe this extremely long explanation, or you don't owe them a TED talk. You don't owe them an apology. No is a complete sentence. The more you explain, the more it sounds like you're asking for permission and you're not. And if you're worried about sounding like a jerk, remember this being clear is being kind.

Corey Berrier: 7:35

Saying yes when you mean no breeds resentment, and that's far worse than just saying no. So you've got to protect your self-esteem. Right? It's like a bouncer at a bar. Right, be the bouncer of your self-esteem. You've got to stop letting people get in your head like it's a free ticket into a nightclub. Right, think of your confidence like a nightclub. You know there's a velvet rope. You're the bouncer. Just because someone says something like you're being selfish. You used to run these calls for me. You should be more flexible Doesn't mean you have to let them pass that rope at the nightclub as an example. You choose what gets in. You choose what affects you.

Corey Berrier: 8:28

If someone criticizes you for taking time off, guess what? That's not about you, that's about them. It's about their needs, not yours. And when you set boundaries, a boundary without consequences is not a boundary. A boundary without consequences is not a boundary. Let's get real for a boundary. A boundary without consequences is not a boundary. Let's get real for a second you can say all the boundaries you want, but if there's no consequences for crossing them, it's just a suggestion.

Corey Berrier: 9:06

Here's an example you tell your coworker not to call you after 8 pm. He keeps calling you. Answer anyway. That's not a boundary, that's a wish. Just wish he wouldn't call me after eight. Instead of setting a boundary, then look, if someone keeps stepping over the line, it's not on them, it's on you. It's not on them, it's on you. End the phone call, walk away, stop showing up for people that disrespect your time. Say it once, enforce it twice and always follow through.

Corey Berrier: 9:45

And boundaries evolve, and that's okay. Here's something most people don't consider. You know, boundaries aren't set in stone. They shift as you grow. When you, you know what you allowed when you were broke doesn't apply now. What you allowed when you were single or what worked for you when you were single and now you've got a family needs to change. What you accepted earlier in your earlier in your career doesn't apply. Once you've earned the respect of whatever your position is now, boundaries should grow with you. You need to check in, you need to adjust and you need to communicate. It's just like you'd replace an old cast iron pipe. Some boundaries need to be upgraded as well. So there's some boundaries you can set in the field.

Corey Berrier: 10:47

Let's talk about running a drain job. Here's a few real-world examples of boundaries on the job. Customer wants you to just run a snake, even though the camera shows a collapse line. I appreciate you could say this to the customer. I appreciate you. I appreciate that you're looking for a quick fix, mr Customer, but I can't do a temporary repair when I know it won't solve the issue long-term. My job is to do it right. Here's another example If you're off the clock, your neighbor says hey, you got five minutes.

Corey Berrier: 11:25

I just need you to take a quick look at this. I appreciate you thinking about me, mr Neighbor, but I'm off duty. Let's get you on the schedule, or your office calls on your day off. Just this once. I need help. I've been clear that today is blocked off for my family. If there's a real emergency, I'm here, but I can't take a routine call today. This isn't being rude, this is professional self-respect.

Corey Berrier: 12:03

So how about boundaries on your team? Let's flip it in the house for a second. Your coworker constantly dumps extra work on you. Set the boundary. I've got my workload dialed in. I'm happy to help if I have time, but I can't take this on right now. Your manager texts you at all hours of the night. You say, for clarity I check messages until 6 pm, anything after that, I'll get it to you in the morning. Until 6 pm, anything after that, I'll get it to you in the morning. A newer technician is riding like you. Get on your last nerve. I want to work together, mr New Technician, but I need respect in our conversations. If that changes, I'm happy to collaborate with you Again clear, direct, respectful.

Corey Berrier: 12:49

So here's the thing. Boundaries are not something that you get to hide behind. I'll give you a real example. One of my technicians sent me a message yesterday. I call and follow up and close the deals that they can't, or just assist them with closing the deals in the house. That's my job, part of my job. That's my favorite part of my job. Job part of my job. That's my favorite part of my job.

Corey Berrier: 13:18

Anyway, he sent me everything that happened at the house, everything about the customer, the customer's name and phone number, and asked me to call. He even called me on the phone and said here's what happened. Here's da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da. And I said yes, of course I'll take care of it for you. I was in the truck I'm not giving you excuses because there's no excuse but I forgot to call the customer back. I made a commitment to my technician that I would handle this for him. Now I'm a human being and I make mistakes, just like anybody else, and I won't make that mistake again.

Corey Berrier: 13:52

Because that and here's the thing last night. Let's just pretend that I said I don't talk on the phone after six o'clock, which I don't say that. But if I did, and I forgot to make that call, which I did last night, it was seven o'clock when I got home. You best damn believe that customer got a call from me. You best believe they got a text message from me. I didn't get a hold of the customer. You best believe I'll be on that first thing this morning because I dropped the ball.

Corey Berrier: 14:22

I dropped the ball and I told the technician. I called him. I said hey, dude, like I 100% dropped the ball on this and he was cool because I usually don't drop the ball, but sometimes those things happen. But you can't say you know, if you realize at 7 pm that you've dropped the ball and your boundary is I don't work after 6 pm, your boundary needs to move a little bit because you dropped the ball. I dropped the ball. If it would have been nine o'clock at night, when I should be in bed, I would have made that call, because it's my job to make sure I do the things that I say I'm going to do, and I want to make sure that I don't lose the respect of my team. So here are some things that you can use and memorize.

Corey Berrier: 15:15

When it comes to setting boundaries, that doesn't work for me. I need to think about, I need time to think about this before I say, yes, I'm not available then, but here's what I can do. I understand, but I won't be doing that. I hear you, but I'm going to stick with what I said earlier. These are powerful tools for your life, for your family, for your friends, for your relationships, for your kids. So let's talk about what happens when you start setting boundaries. Let me warn you, when you start setting real boundaries, people are not going to like it. They're going to say stuff like Corey, you've changed, you're just not as available as you used to be, you're not being a team player, but guess what? That's proof that the boundaries are working when people are used to you being a yes man and suddenly you stop. They feel it. Let them, let them feel it.

Corey Berrier: 16:26

Your job isn't to keep everyone happy. Your job is to keep yourself healthy, focused and respected. Now, how do boundaries? Let me go back for a second. If you're now, if you're in a startup company, like I'm, in a newer company, there are things that you've got to do in that situation where boundaries really don't matter, because you're trying to. You're trying to build this, we're trying to build this company quickly, and it takes a lot of hats to do that and it takes, you know, one person wearing several hats to make these things happen.

Corey Berrier: 17:06

So if you're in a situation like that, then you know you got to have boundaries, but at the same time, you also got to understand what you signed up for. And if you know, if you're in a well-established organization that's been around for 15 years, well that's a different story when people are just running all over you asking you to do things that you shouldn't be doing. But when you're in the earlier stages of a company, you got to be willing. You got to be willing to do whatever it takes to make it work, because running a business is hard and there's a lot of moving parts and, at the end of the day, if that's not you, the boundary is you shouldn't take that job. It's that simple. That job, it's that simple.

Corey Berrier: 17:59

So boundaries help you build confidence. They and you get more energy from that. Do you want more energy at work? Do you want to feel more focused? You want to stop resenting your customers, your team, your family, because you're not going to be able to do that If you start resenting your customers, they're going to feel that resentment. They're going to feel like you don't want to be there, and no company wants to have an employee that's resentful. It's just, that's all there is to it. Set clear boundaries, right. Don't let yourself get into that situation. Right, don't let yourself get into that situation.

Corey Berrier: 18:32

When you start, when you stop, you know when you, when you stop leaking out your energy through guilt, overcommitment, people pleasing, you finally show up as your best self on and off the job. Boundaries are not, they're not just defense, they're the offense of your life. You're protecting yourself by setting boundaries, and you know. Let's just talk about the people pleasing thing. I've been a people pleaser all my life and it's draining because you always feel like you're being taken advantage of, but you are the one letting people take advantage of you because you're being taken advantage of, but you are the one letting people take advantage of you because you're overcommitting. You're people pleasing. You just want to do the next thing that makes the boss happy. At the end of the day, you're going to wind up being miserable if you don't watch that.

Corey Berrier: 19:27

Don't take on stuff that you don't know how to do. Don't commit to doing something that you're not going to have time to do, because it's going to backfire on you. So I want you to think about this week. I'm going to give you a quick challenge. I want you to pick out one area in your life where you're saying yes, but you really want to say no, and maybe that's yeah, honey, I'll be home by six, knowing you're not going to make it home by six. And instead of saying I'm not going to make it home by six, you say, oh, yeah, I'll be there by six. Well, now you've broken trust with your wife or your girlfriend, whoever it is that you're saying that to. You know, write that stuff down. Write it down and then really assess how you can change by clearly and calmly communicating the things that you would really rather say no to and then back it up with action and watch what changes.

Corey Berrier: 20:31

Listen, this will change your energy. Like I said before, it'll change your confidence. It'll change how you show up with your customers. It'll change how you show up with your wife or your fiance or your girlfriend or whatever you're whoever it is you're with. Because listen, dude, like your job is important.

Corey Berrier: 20:58

If you're in the trades, people can't do the things that you do every day. So it drives me nuts when I hear people say well, I'm just a plumber or I'm just an h-fac technician, or I'm just an HVAC technician or I'm just an electrician Bullshit. You're doing jobs that most people don't know how to do. You're doing jobs that most people don't want to do. Most people don't want to dig through feces to fix a problem, but if you're a plumber, you are the guy that does that. Don't discount the fact that you do the work that most people don't want to do.

Corey Berrier: 21:40

So appreciate you listening to the Successful Life Podcast. I hope this episode has helped you see boundaries a bit different. I'd ask you share this with your team. Share it with your family. Boundary's a bit different. I'd ask you share this with your team, share it with your family, share it with your employees, if you're an owner, because you know this is going to help you lead with clarity, confidence, calm boundaries and everybody wins.

Corey Berrier: 22:12

So I know, if you're listening to this show, you want to get better, you want to be more successful, you want to be happier and this, my friend, will help you get there. So until next week I appreciate you listening Do me a favor Go to Apple Podcasts, scroll down to about the middle. You'll see where it says Rate and Review. Hit the five stars, leave a written review for me, because it helps us get this out to more people. You know I don't get paid to do this. I do this because I really enjoy it and I hope that it helps people and I know there's a few that it does and if you're one of those few and you haven't left a review, I'd appreciate it if you would. All right, guys, we'll see you next week.